Ode to the gym...

Oh, gym...
My friend, my foe.
I love thee, I hate thee...
I ask, "why don't I just go?"

Excuses, excuses.
They keep me from you.
But when we connect,
My true feelings shine through.

To go, or not to go...
That is the question I ask.
Then more of those excuses...
Why don't the endorphins last?!

OK -- I was at the gym tonight and was busting my butt. Sweating, working hard, feeling good, totally feeling the calories flying off my body - wondering all the while why I try to talk myself out to going so often. One of the trainers even came by and told me what I good job I was doing and how she could tell I was giving it all I had. It felt awesome -- definetely those endorphins they want about!!!! :)

I wish I had the willpower to make myself go everyday. I wish I had the motivation to get my ass out of bed earlier and work out before school. I wish I had the energy, time, etc.. etc.. to stretch or do yogo before bed.

BUT DO I??????????

Most of the time, no.

Why?

I DO NOT KNOW!

It is frustrating to me that I cannot find it within myself after all I've accomplished so far to "JUST DO IT" (go Nike) but I find it so difficult. I wish I was one of those people who could say "I LOVE TO EXERCISE!" or "I LOVE TO GO TO THE GYM!" -- but I am SO not that person. If there was a magic pill I could take and sit back and prop my feet up and grade some papers while I got a workout --- I would totally take it! haha --- although I like feeling good about myself and proud of myself for working out, I do not like it. I do not LOOK FORWARD to running in place, on a treadmill, on the eliptical, lifting weights, stretching, sit-ups, machines, etc.. etc.. -- NOPE! Not a single one of those.

So, in conclusion --- if anyone has any bottled up ambition or motivation - send it my way! :) In the meantime, I will continue to be proud of myself for the positive changes I do make and hopefully the results will continue to speak for themselves and I will continue to want to see them! That wedding dress in the back of my mind is CERTAINLY motivation enough, one would think!!! :)